University of california application personal statement

My body trembled; it was difficult to breathe. By the end of middle school, my losses outweighed my wins, and I no longer believed in myself. I explained my anxieties, hoping he could fix them. This is how you win. The advice was almost annoyingly simple. And yet, his Zen-like philosophy emanated every time he watched from the sidelines. He was trying to get me to enjoy tennis as I had not been able to for years. I won more, though not a whole tournament. More importantly, I took the new perspective off the court, to AP English, my toughest class, when my mind would always wander to my mom.

It took me tremendous effort to write essays and comprehend the material. I was so scattered that my teacher advised me to drop the class. I stayed in the class, focused on each step, gradually improving, ultimately earning a 4 on the AP exam. When school was out, I got my reward: I could come home and sit next to my mom, and just be with her for a while. Maria successfully handles three challenges in this question by wrapping them into one: Her key idea comes in an unexpected place, right in the middle of the essay.

But then she quickly and clearly articulates how that manifested to her—low energy, exhaustion. This paragraph has a clear thesis statement—tennis helped her—and then backs into a bit of context about tennis, which is necessary for us to understand the rest of the essay. It also articulates a goal—winning a tournament—which in this case ends up being a red herring.

Paragraphs 3 and 4: In these paragraphs we see growth and change. Paragraph 5: This concluding paragraph very clearly though not heavy-handedly ties up all three challenges, telling us how the tennis philosophy served her through her school troubles. Often when we are facing major challenges—illness, grief, loss, anxiety, etc—we are dealing with emotions beyond the scope of language.

That means that the language we use to talk about it, with other people, with therapists, and in an essay, can sound like platitudes. Maria does a good job here of acknowledging that the words her coach gave her were not enough. Here, again, is Question 6, with notes from the UC Admissions website about how to think about it:. If that applies to you, what have you done to further that interest? Have you been able to pursue coursework at a higher level in this subject honors, AP, IB, college or university work?

Are you inspired to pursue this subject further at UC, and how might you do that? Nadia has a strong response to this question that we will use as an example:. My interest in the subject encouraged me to enroll in the Advanced Placement course.

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One of the topics discussed that spoke to me most is the power of political participation. There, I spent four months answering phone calls, filing papers, and reading letters, and learned the importance of community relations, social skills, and organizational skills needed to thrive in politics.

My duties were similar to that of my internship, where I addressed complaints from students and moderated them directly to the administration. One example was when a group of students approached me regarding the lack of a mock trial class at our school. I gathered signatures, wrote a letter of request, and took the matter to the principal. My community participation led the school to offer a mock trial class to all middle and high school students.

At the University of California, I intend to pursue a major in Political Science to further my understanding of politics and the impact of each individual on policymaking.

How to Write the University of California Essay Prompts 2018-12222

Furthermore, I am compelled to participate in student government upon my acceptance to UC schools in order to exercise my interests in a much larger and diverse community of students. Sometimes it is the right choice to use dramatic language to talk about a dramatic issue. She developed an interest in politics, and went about chasing that career. This is an example of an essay that opens with its thesis statement.

She also tells us that her interest stemmed from the intersection of theory and real-life application, which means that we can expect her essay to discuss the real-life application of politics. And indeed it does! Off the bat, Nadia tells us about working for Dababneh in paragraph 2, and in the ensuing paragraph, about her student council work. Giving us two different experiences is great because it shows a pattern of interest in the subject. That tells the admissions committee not only that there was change and growth, that key quality the middle of the essay must convey, but also that Nadia is aware of that change and growth and can make narrative sense of it.

Nadia concludes with a natural spin-it-forward take. At UC, she plans on continuing with these interests, and she knows exactly how. But this essay is spot-on in answering the question honestly and with good energy. Here, again, is Question 7, with notes from the UC Admissions website about how to think about it:.

Think of community as a term that can encompass a group, team or a place — like your high school, hometown or home. You can define community as you see fit, just make sure you talk about your role in that community. Was there a problem that you wanted to fix in your community? Why were you inspired to act? What did you learn from your effort? How did your actions benefit others, the wider community or both? Did you work alone or with others to initiate change in your community? For most of my childhood, I was overweight. It took two years to shed not only the weight but also the pain that had come with being a pariah.

I did not want anyone else to suffer from the physical and mental pain that I endured as an overweight child. In order to spread awareness about childhood obesity, I co-founded the Healthy Kids club, which organizes fundraisers and invites guest speakers to educate students about early-onset heart disease and diabetes, as well as how these diseases follow into adulthood and worsen with age. We worked to get healthier snacks in school, successfully banning certain junk foods like chips and soda, and regularly met with cafeteria staff to ensure health conscientious items remain on the menu.

In my junior year, we registered the organization as a c 3 nonprofit. My own experience led me to found the group, and continues to inform our presentations. At each session with young people, I tell my own story. The ability to show students pictures of myself from five years ago, not being able to play sports or participate in PE due to asthma, and now the captain of a varsity team, means I can connect with students on a personal level. As I depart for college, I will ensure that the Healthy Kids Foundation remains a presence in my high school hallways, and I hope to create a chapter of it at the University of California, where I can draw on college students to serve as volunteers, spreading the message in even more communities.

Notice that in this essay, she did get pretty personal, which makes that hyper-efficient academics question more tenable. Talking about her own vulnerability also serves another purpose: In other words, you should try to tap into a global issue and address how you dealt with it locally.

These paragraphs document and detail what Nadia did in the group. Her trademark efficiency is back here. Nadia concludes this by returning to her personal story, which bookends the essay nicely, and then she also does what she did in the academics question, spinning her interest forward. Here, again, is Question 8, with notes from the UC Admissions website about how to think about it:. What have you not shared with us that will highlight a skill, talent, challenge or opportunity that you think will help us know you better? From your point of view, what do you feel makes you an excellent choice for UC?

For example, I have heard many Armenians express serious disapproval about Armenians like my mother marrying odars, that is, foreigners. Unfortunately, this way of thinking insults my proud Mexican-American heritage, and leads me to wonder whether I am a disgrace or even a burden to my community. This thought process extends to my relationships with others. I am often wondering if race plays into how people interact with me. But the bad has sometimes outweighed the good, causing my confidence to plummet. I hope to develop a more positive self-concept at the University of California through interactions with diverse students and by studying my two heritages in a way I cannot in high school.

Through ethnic studies classes—many of which were pioneered at UC schools—and extracurricular groups, I think I can have more conversations about race that have not been possible in my life thus far. By learning from professors and other student leaders, I will be able to facilitate complex, yet necessary conversations about race for others, in turn, so that members of my college community feel integrated and appreciated for their differences.

In another one of his essays, the Academic Passion question Question 6 , he did discuss his interest in cultural studies and global identities. In this case, Arman has set up one concept—his outsider status—in paragraph 1, and he uses paragraph 2 to briefly caveat it, acknowledging what his reader might be thinking. Now, Arman spins things forward, and in a very rich manner. He also shows that he knows something about the UC system, referencing its diversity and academic history. There is, for the fourth response, one required question all transfer applicants must address.

Here it is:. Please describe how you have prepared for your intended major, including your readiness to succeed in your upper-division courses once you enroll at the university. How did your interest in your major develop? Do you have any experience related to your major outside the classroom — such as volunteer work, internships and employment, or participation in student organizations and activities?

This may include working with faculty or doing research projects. I have spent my first two years at Foothill Community College in Los Altos, California, learning about the technology industry, which is in our backyard. It has been an education both in and out of the classroom. In the classroom, I have focused on computer science, while out of the classroom I have completed internships to learn more about Silicon Valley, where I hope to make my career. My computer science courses have prepared me technically for a career in the industry.

From my class in IT systems to my honors distinctions as a Cisco securities technician and as a VMWare certified professional, I have the skills to find work at a technology company as I did as an intern last summer at a software firm in San Jose. My hope is that by transferring to the University of California, I can add to these competencies a larger sense of the technology world, by learning about advancements across fields from virtual reality to artificial intelligence.

I have also prepared to pursue a second major in business at the University of California. All this has trained me to understand the day-to-day workings of businesses. I look forward to learning more about international business trends at the University of California, and to attending public talks led by business leaders around the state. She devotes this paragraph to talking about technology. It also recalls her other essay about her talent, and keeps a consistent picture.

Denise then does the same thing in her business paragraph. In both paragraphs, she makes sure to spin things forward, making it clear that she has goals that will be much more easily achieved if she can attend the University of California. Take a look at our Common App Activities Section guide for general help with tackling extracurriculars. Because the UC application allows for more entries—and a higher character count, as opposed to —than Common App, we suggest writing the UC list first, then figuring out what your top 10 most important or meaningful activities are and cutting those down to size for the Common App.

To choose which schools to apply to, research introductions to the campus provided by the university admissions offices, try to visit, watch YouTube videos of campus tours, and speak with current students and alumni about their college experience. Those will give you a good sense of the qualitative elements that distinguish campuses from one another. Each campus has different demographics.


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At UC Berkeley, about 60 percent of freshmen in the fall of were in-state students, whereas at UC Riverside, 88 percent were. Out-of-state applicants must have a 3. You can find more information about the differences between applying as an in-state versus out-of-state student here , from the admissions office.

17 UC Essay Examples AKA Personal Insight Questions

The University of California is a popular choice for international students for many reasons. These are big research schools, and some of the best in the world. There are longstanding questions among California residents about how the UCs make their decisions. There have been reports, for instance, about capping out-of-state admits to keep things from being too competitive for in-state students. Nevertheless, one thing college counselors seem to agree on: In general, college admissions are getting more competitive because more people are applying to college.

This is the case for in- and out-of-state applicants. But it seems like the UCs have responded to public criticism a few years ago by holding out-of-state applicants to high standards requiring a baseline of a 3. Overall, though, students who attend better schools with more resources are expected to achieve higher academically and extracurricularly than their counterparts at schools with fewer AP classes, extracurriculars, etc. Holistic admissions means students are evaluated within their own context, based on whether or not they took full advantage of what was available to them.

Many students from competitive public and private high schools across the state get in each year, so it's certainly possible to get into a Tier 1 UC regardless of where you attended high school. But if you feel strongly about one course of study or another, you might consider making that a topic or a mention in one of your essay responses. Medical School Admissions College Admissions. Your Trusted Advisors for Admissions Succes. Intended major. Full legal name no nicknames.

Address and phone number. E-mail address. Date of birth. The last four digits of your social security number if applicable. Copies of all transcripts. Mail your appeal to: If the appeal is granted, you may then fill out an electronic application online. Please note that the data in your application will need to match the data in your appeal letter for the online application to be processed. However, if the appeal is granted, you do not have to do anything more. The central processor will bill you for the application fee by mail.

Statement of Application Integrity The University of California encourages applicants to seek assistance from parents, counselors, teachers and others in presenting themselves in the best possible light on the undergraduate admission application and in their personal statement. We remind applicants that all information must be complete, accurate, and their own work. Failure to submit accurate information will jeopardize consideration for admission to UC for the current or any future terms.

Students found to have falsified application information will be subject to penalties.

The Essays That Got Me Accepted To UC Berkeley

To choose which questions to answer, first browse the eight prompts as a list, and sort them into one of three categories: Afterwards, jot down bullet point ideas for the questions you for sure want to write about. While doing so, it is important to base your decision on not only your immediate liking for the topic, but also on the available substance anecdotes. Repeat this process until you are faced with only four questions. This is just one way to approach choosing prompts. Since for some, the process happens organically, do not feel constrained to the method above.

Just remember: They are looking for how you have fostered mentorship, creative tension, and group action in your organization. Leadership roles are not limited to titled positions or to the school environment. For example, just because you were only a member in the chess club does not mean you cannot have taken leadership in organizing a tournament or fundraiser. If you have indeed occupied a leadership role, convince the admissions officers that you have used the position to positively influence others.

By defining creativity as, but not limited to, problem-solving, novel thinking, and artistic expression, this prompt expands creativity to encompass all academic fields. All these examples, if explained well, demonstrate creativity. Ideally, you would want to finish your essay by detailing how you will apply such creative thinking in college and beyond.

Although it would be easy to list all the awards you have won in the activity you are best in, this prompt is looking for something deeper and more meaningful. It is perfectly fine to describe an activity you are dedicated to, but also think about the character and personality traits that tie into the activity, such as tenacity, honesty, and compassion. The key is to elucidate why this activity is worth putting all your time into, and how your personality strengths are exhibited through this activity. Describe the beauty and the meaning of the activity, convincing the admissions officers that this activity rightly takes precedence over everything else.

Do not be put off by this prompt if you have not won any big awards. All the prompt asks for is what you think is your greatest talent or skill. Make sure to also address how you have developed and demonstrated this talent. Do you put in small amounts of practice every day, or strenuous hours for a couple short periods each year?

Why do you allocate your time this way? How have you shown off your talent or skill to other people? Have you won competitions, done performances, gotten into showcases, or shined artistically? Here are a few examples: Things to consider: An educational opportunity can be anything that has added value to your educational experience and better prepared you for life. For example, participation in an honors enrichment program or enrollment in an academy geared toward a profession, or even a particularly enlightening conversation with an adult — just to name a few. If you choose to write about educational barriers you have faced, what personal characteristics or skills did you call on to overcome this challenge?

How has the process shaped you as a person? An added plus would be talking about passing it forward and helping those in your purview obtain the knowledge you did from your experiences. Choose to write only about one of the two. You applied to a specialized program in your school and was accepted. It allowed you to work intensely in a specific STEM field such as engineering, and landed you an internship with local engineering companies, in addition to giving you an opportunity to work with elementary school students in budding engineering programs.