I t hink of all t he t hings t hat have happened during t hose sevent y- seven years, t he t rium phs and set backs Gran achieved and endured, and it has given m e st rengt h t o deal wit h t he challenges in m y own life. What will I becom e? I will not , like Gran, be a part of t he Oklahom a land run or wit ness t he birt h of t he aut om obile. I will probably not be quarant ined for t uberculosis or list en t o t he progression of t wo world wars over t he radio.

But I know I will do and be som et hing. And t he det erm inat ion and success of m y great- grandm ot her will help m e reach t his som et hing. Her st ruggles and achievem ent s are reflect ed in m ine. She is wit h m e when I rise and fall and always t here t o m ake sure m y feet are st ill on t he ground. She is wit h m e backst age and wit h m e in t he spot light. She is a wom an. She is m y great- grandm ot her. She sit s down, ret urning t o her init ial posit ion wit h her feet dangling over t he edge.

She brings t he binoculars t o her eyes and looks t hrough t hem. But inst ead of looking at t he audience, she is at t em pt ing t o look beyond t hem , alm ost as if t here is som e invisible sky behind t he rows of seat s. She slowly m oves t he binoculars away from her face, but her eyes are st ill fixed on som e obj ect off in t he dist ance. Only sixt y-xi years t o go. ANALYSI S Writ t en in t he form at of a play script m onologue, bot h in st yle and overall st ruct ure, t his essay addresses t he concept t hat it is difficult t o evaluat e a person from st rict ly superficial appearances.

The writ er does not j ust t heorize about such ideas, but m akes a logical progression by giving a concret e, vivid exam ple t o back up her t hesis. Wit hout having t o explicit ly list int erest s or personalit y t rait s, t hey st yle of t he essay reveals a good deal about t he applicant: One of t he st rongest aspect s of t he essay is t he fact t hat it is writ t en as a m onologue.

The creat ive form at is going t o st and out from t he t housands of ot her applicat ion essays t hat adm issions officers m ust read.

65 successful harvard business school application essays second edition pdf

The use of binoculars as a linking device bet ween t he present and t he past is highly effect ive — it produces an overall coherence wit hin t he essay. I n m any cases, essays writ t en about fam ily m em ber can sound cont rived. The essay also ends st rongly as t he last line clearly ident ifies t hat t he applicant is am bit ious, hard- working, and eager t o m ake som et hing out of her life. The m onologue of t he essay is effect ive, but it is im port ant t o point out t hat such at t em pt s t o be overly creat ive can backfire.

I f you at t em pt t o writ e your essay in a nonst andard m anner, m ake sur. By Daniel G. Habib My childhood passions oscillat ed bet ween t wo poles: Locat ed across Sixt y- Sevent h St reet from one anot her, t he t wo cryst allized t he occupat ions of m y yout h. On a t ypical day, I m oved bet ween a close- knit group of friends at t he park t o largely solit ary st ays at t he library. My recreat ional pursuit s were com m unal; m y int ellect ual pursuit s were individual.

The gulf was pronounced: Generally, I slipped away from t he park during a lull in t he act ion and ret urned as st ealt hily as I had gone, foist ing Roald Dahl paperbacks on m y m ot her and scram bling t o rej oin m y friends in arguing t he relat ive m erit s of t he Hulk and Superm an. I never t hought t o int egrat e t hese passions; t hey rem ained firm ly segregat ed. That Clark Kent and Willy Wonka should never cross pat hs was a given; t he giant s exist ed in separat e realm s of m y life.

More t han anyt hing else, m y Regis career has reversed t hat assum pt ion. I now recognize t hat m y int ellect ual growt h and m y peer com m unit y are inext ricably linked. I have com e t o regard t hose who surround m e not sim ply as a net work of friends, but m ost vit ally as com ponent s in t he ongoing work of educat ion. I underst and t hat an individualized process of learning is int ellect ually im poverished. The m ost st art ling of m y educat ional epiphanies have occurred in t he cont ext of fellow st udent s.

Case in point: My first reading of t he classic, in sixt h grade, cam e in an at om ized int ellect ual clim at e. You know who kills t he Arab all along. Each m em ber of t he class offered his insight s for considerat ion, risking t he scrut iny of t he group but confident in it s int ellect ual generosit y.

The rigorous st andards of t he class, and our com m on desire for underst anding, led event ually t o firm er com prehension. My balanced int erpret at ion of Cam us derived only from t he int ensit y of discussion, t he cont ribut ions of m y peers, and our m ut ual willingness t o share our insight s. Speakers engage each ot her on subj ect s ranging from dem ocrat ic and free- m arket Plagiarism is severely punished!

Pract ices involve evaluat ion by fellow t eam m em bers and success depends int im at ely on an accurat e com m on underst anding of t he issues Lincoln- Douglas Debat e, sim ilarly, ent ails t eam form ulat ions of argum ent based on philosophical principles.

The assim ilat ionist cam p suggest ed t hat t he achievem ent of group dignit y and a privat e ident it y for t he deaf had t o occur against t he backdrop of a larger public ident it y. The separat ism inherent in ASL or deaf schools fat ally divorced t he group from m eaningful part icipat ion in t he Am erican dem ocracy. True cult ural uniqueness required a com m on fram e of reference.

Conversely, t he deaf separat ist part isans m aint ained t hat t his decidedly m arginalized m inorit y deserved a dist inct ness of cult ure com m ensurat e wit h t he dist inct ness of it s experience. Separat ion allowed dignit y and em powerm ent. As t he hours wore on and t he dialect ic raged out of cont rol, posit ions becam e m ore ent renched, but paradoxically a t ruer com prehension arose.

The eloquence and persuasiveness wit h which each side advanced it s int erpret at ion furt hered t he exchange. We acknowledged and respect ed t he logic of t hose wit h whom we disagreed, and we reinforced our own convict ions by art iculat ing and defending t hem. I f I began m y educat ional career as an int ellect ual m onopolist , I have evolved int o a collect ivist. Som e praised it s t ransm ission of bleakness and pessim ism ; ot hers j oined crit ics in at t acking it s excesses and it s art ist ic license in m anipulat ing t he original.

Regis has wonderfully fused t he com m unal and t he int ellect ual phases of m y life. But while m any applicant s m ay choose a defining and dist inct m om ent — winning t he st at e speech t ournam ent or set t ing t he school record for t he highest GPA —as an experience wort h ret elling, Habib inst ead chooses t o chronicle t he gradual process of int ellect ual m at urat ion. By choosing t his t opic, Habib has t he opport unit y t o reflect on his educat ion and recount several form at ive experiences, not j ust resort t o t rit e descript ions of winning or losing.

The fact t hat Habib m akes t he argum ent successfully, t hrough t he use of det ails and concret e exam ples, m akes t he essay all t he m ore im pressive. The sent ences can be com plex and a bit convolut ed. The language used, while enough t o im press any Kaplan SAT inst ruct or, could be t oned down t o m ake t he essay m ore readerfriendly.

Habib could have easily short ened his st at em ent by using fewer exam ples of real- life learning experiences. Or t he experiences he shares could have been short ened: All in all, it is a well- writ t en essay enhanced by personal insight s, exam ples, and t he all- im port ant det ails. Kirchhoff Beepbeep. Wit h a series of subt le but relent less beeps, m y fait hful Tim ex I ronm an wat ch alarm signaled t he st art of anot her day, gent ly ending t he pleasant slum ber I so oft en fail t o enj oy.

Wit h t he t ouch of a but t on I silenced t he alarm , falling back on m y bed t o est ablish a firm er grasp of where I was and why on eart h I had set m y alarm for 5: Slowly t he out line of m y soundly sleeping room m at e cam e int o focus. Beyond his bed was t he window. Across t he Neva River t he view of t he Herm it age and Wint er Palace, illum inat ed bright ly wit h spot light s, faded in and out of t he falling snow. I was definit ely st ill in St.

I dialed t he front desk. I reached for m y running t ight s, glad t hat m eant negat ive seven degrees Celsius.

65 successful harvard business school application essays second edition pdf

I t ook anot her look int o t he darkness out side. Negat ive seven degrees Fahrenheit and I would not be running. The hot el lobby was em pt y except for t he guard and t he wom an at t he desk. As I st epped out side, I pressed t he st art but t on on m y Tim ex I ronm an and began j ogging. I t was a prist ine m orning. The Novem ber wind prom pt ly rem inded m e j ust what wint er m eant at 60 degrees nort h lat it ude. Wit h t he sky await ing t he break of dawn, I st art ed m aking m y way t hrough t he newly fallen snow.

Soon t he sound of m y labored breat hing cam e t hrough t he rhyt hm ic swooshing of running shoes dancing t hrough t he snow. As clouds of breat h collect ed in front of m e, I passed slowly t hrough t hem , m arking m y forward progress wit h each exhale. Around t he corner I found a freshly shoveled sidewalk. Follow ing t he invit ing pat h, I soon cam e upon t he shoveler, an old m an sport ing t he classic Russian wint er out fit: Tim e had left it s m ark on his wrinkled face and worn clot hing.

Despit e t he falling snow, which accum ulat ed at a far great er pace t han t he m an could keep up wit h, he cont inued t o shovel relent lessly, barely glancing up as I j ogged by him. I respect his perseverance. He was working fiercely in t he Russian spirit. And as t he war m edals proudly displayed on his coat indicat e, he had been doing so for a while. Perhaps t his m an was one of t he few t hat survived t he Nazi siege on Leningrad, a living rem inder of why t he Unit ed St at es m ust rem ain deeply involved in world polit ics.

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As I t urned and ran across t he bridge leading downt own, t he bat t leship Pot em kin cam e int o view. St ill afloat as a working m useum , young sailors in full m ilit ary dress cleared it s decks of snow. While I ran past t he ship, a sailor st opped t o wave. A few seconds lat er I glanced back, not icing t hat t he sam e sailor was st ill looking at m e. I m ust have been quit e a sight in m y bright ly colored Nike running suit t reading t hrough a foot of new snow. While running past t he Wint er Palace, I quickened m y pace, half expect ing t he Tsarina t o st ep out and st op m y progress.

I sprint ed t hrough Revolut ion Square, glancing left t o see t he spot where Tsar Nicolas abdicat ed and right t o see t he m onum ent com m em orat ing t he defeat of Napoleon. While t rodding t hrough hist oric St. Pet ersburg, I reflect ed on t he last discussion I had wit h Sasha, m y Russian host st udent. What begun as a quest ion- and- answer session about life in t he Unit ed St at es becam e a t it anic Plagiarism is severely punished! He want ed t o know about our governm ent and what dem ocracy m eant for him and his people. Being t he first U. Realizing t hat m y response could forever shape his im pression of dem ocracy in t he U.

For Russians, dem ocracy rem ains a new and unt rust ed m et hod of governm ent. Clearly, Russia is st ill in a st at e of change, vulnerable t o t he forces of t he past and skept ical of t he fut ure. Sasha, unable t o share m y fait h in t he dem ocrat ic polit ical process, list ened pat ient ly t o m y explanat ions. I t ried m y best t o help Sasha concept ualize what t he Unit ed St at es is about and j ust what it m eans t o be an Am erican.

For t he sake of bot h count ries I hope he accept ed m y prodem ocracy argum ent. I t was conversat ions like t hese t hat brought a new sense of urgency t o m y t im e in Russia. His dream of serving as a diplom at m ay very well m at erialize. Perhaps som eday Sasha will be in a posit ion t o m ake decisions t hat affect t he Unit ed St at es.

I hope m y im pression will in som e way affect his j udgm ent in a posit ive m anner. Aft er j ogging up t he hot el st eps, I pressed t he st op but t on. Not bad for a m orning run I t hought. Press Mode but t on. Tim e zone one: Colum bus, Ohio. So you t hink you can change t he world? Tim e zone t wo: Pet ersburg, Russia, Novem ber 4, Perhaps in som e sm all way I can change t he world, one conversat ion at a t im e. Arm ed wit h a keen int erest in t he post- Com m unist plight , I set fort h t o learn from m y Russian bret hren and t o t each t hem about t heir Am erican peers.

I nst ead, Kirchhoff t ells t he adm issions com m it t ee about t he Russia he has com e t o know on his early- m orning j ogs. We learn t hat he is a disciplined runner, a percept ive observer of hum an nat ure, a willing learner of t he Russian language. Bright Nike running t ight s, his Tim e I ronm an, and t he rhyt hm ic swooshing of his running shoes are det ails t hat his audience will rem em ber. They also provide t he perfect segue int o t he m ore subst ant ive issues Kirchhoff want s t o address in his essay — t he conversat ions he has had wit h Russians his age.

The reader get s t o know Kirchhoff before we get t o know his views on such weight ier subj ect s as diplom acy and t he Am erican role in int ernat ional relat ions. I deally, it would have been nice t o hear j ust as m uch det ail about his conversat ions wit h Sasha as we do about St. Pet ersburg at 6 A. The essay loses t he det ails when it m at t ers m ost. These m ist akes are rat her m inor since t he essay is not part icularly cent ered on t he ship. However, let t his serve as a valuable lesson: I t consist ed of boiled pot at oes, carrot s, eggs, bologna and pickles diced int o t iny cubes and m ixed int o a giant enam el pot t oget her wit h canned peas and m ayonnaise.

I t was considered a delicacy, and prepared only on special occasions such as birt hday and dinner part ies. But it was also a rit ual, t he only com ponent of t he first course which was never absent from a dinner t able, no m at t er which of our relat ives or friends was t hrowing t he feast. I ronically, t he salade Olivier was never m y favorit e food, t hough t he at t it ude of m y t ast e buds t o t he dish did evolve t hrough t he years. Only recent ly did I resign m yself t o t he fact t hat all t he ingredient s m ust be consum ed sim ult aneously for m axim um enj oym ent as well as for t he sake of expediency.

I t m ay seem odd, t hen, t o be writ ing in such lengt h in praise of a dish one does not part icularly like. But culinary m em ories are det erm ined not so m uch by whet her we found a food t ast y, but by t he event s, people, and at m ospheres of which t he food serves as a rem inder.

I n m y m ind, t he very m aking of t he salade has always been associat ed wit h t he j oyful bust le t hat accom panied t he celebrat ions for which t he dish was prepared: Though sim ple in t heory, t he preparat ion of t he salade Olivier was a form idable undert aking which occupied half t he m orning and all but one of t he st ove burners. As I sat at t he kit chen t able, m y five- year- old fingers covered in several layers of pot at o skin, m y m ot her and I would lead heart- t o- heart discussions, whose t opics I no longer rem em ber, but of which I never t ired.

Event ually, m y m ot her int roduced m e t o t he Dicing of t he Pot at oes, and t hen t o t he Dicing of t he Bologna, t he Dicing of t he Pickles, t he Shelling of t he Eggs and t he St irring in of t he Mayonnaise as well. But t here was one st age of t he process I found especially m esm erizing. I t was t he Dicing of t he Eggs, carried out one hard- boiled egg at a t im e wit h t he help of an egg- cut t er.

Not hing was m ore pleasing t o t he eye t han t he sight of t hose seven wire- like blades, arranged like prison bars, slicing t hrough t he sm oot h, soft ellipsoid. Today, we st ill m ake t he salade Olivier on som e form al occasions, and, as before, I som et im es part icipat e. And every t im e I see t he eggslicer or sm ell t he pickles, I am rem inded of our Kiev apart m ent , of t hose m uch- ant icipat ed birt hday part ies, of t he j oy I felt as I helped m y m ot her cook: The salade Olivier, a delicacy in bot h Ukranian and Russian diet s, serves as t he cent ral organizat ional m ot if for t his descript ion.

This t echnique forces t he Plagiarism is severely punished! Only in t he end are t hings revealed, and even t hen t he reader m ay not be fully sat isfied. The caram el- skinned m an on m y left holds his cane as if t he world is wait ing for his ent rance. On m y right t he t aller vanilla- skinned m an st ands erect as if he m ust carry t he world. Each m an reaches for m y hand and before long, a t ug- of- war ensues bet ween t hem. Each t ries t o pull m e over t he line of agreem ent but m y body st ays in t he m iddle. During t his st ruggle I hear t heir voices saying: My t orso st ret ches wider and wider.

My arm s grow in lengt h as each m an pulls and pulls. Washingt on and W. Du Bois, t wo foes at t em pt ing t o answer a quest ion t hat never seem s t o go away: I at t em pt ed t o present t heir views in t he I B Ext ended Essay. While I wrot e t he paper som et hing inside of m e felt t he need t o agree wit h and choose one philosophy over t he ot her. So t his st ruggle developed. I n t he beginning, Washingt on looked as if he had already lost t he t ug- of- war. Aft er exam ining Washingt on, exam ining Du Bois was like j um ping int o a hot bat h Plagiarism is severely punished!

Du Bois represent s everyt hing I grew up adm iring. Du Bois was t he radical who at t ended Harvard Universit y. I had no choice but t o agree wit h Du Bois. These fact s m ade m e feel t hat m aybe African-Am ericans had shoved Washingt on t oo far back int o t he closet. At t his j unct ure, Washingt on began t o give Du Bois com pet it ion in a form erly one- sided war. Econom ic prosperit y m eans power; a race wit h econom ic power cannot be denied social equalit y, right?

I n order t o resolve t he dilem m a present ed by t his t ug- of- war, I looked at t he ingredient s of m y life. Washingt on appealed t o t he part of m e t hat want ed t o forget about social equalit y. That part of m e want ed t o live as it cam e and focus only on self- advancem ent. Du Bois appealed t o t he part of m e t hat felt no m an was a m an wit hout social equalit y. Eit her way, bot h appealed t o m y life as an African-Am erican. Neit her m an won t he t ug- of- war. Maybe t his t ug- of—war in m y head was not m eant t o be won because t heir philosophies influenced m e equally.

Washingt on provided t he pract ical ingredient s for social advancem ent while Du Bois provided t he int ellect ual ingredient s for such advancem ent. African-Am ericans m ust evaluat e bot h philosophies and det erm ine how bot h views can facilit at e t he advancem ent of t he race. I st ill st and bet ween t wo m en but now I em brace t hem equally. Writ ing an essay about t his part of your developm ent is insight ful int o your person and your views.

Adm issions officers are t rying t o get t o a port rait of who you are and what you value, and lit t le is m ore revealing t han a st ruggle for racial ident it y. Freelon chose t o writ e about t wo black leaders t o show what her racial ident it y m eans t o her. Her essay also shows a keen int erest in how hist ory can be applied t o her life — an int erest t hat would appeal t o adm issions officers t rying t o pick t hought ful individuals. She m oves sm oot hly from her opening t hought s int o t he body of t he essay and devot es equal t im e t o each philosophy. She also shows clear exam ples of why she originally liked Du Bois and why she changed her m ind about Washingt on.

Her essay show im port ant elem ent s Plagiarism is severely punished! The m ain danger in t his essay is oversim plificat ion. She also assum es a fam iliarit y on t he part of t he adm issions officers wit h issues of racial ident it y, which m ay or m ay not be t rue. The t em perat ure knob is t urned as far as it can go, and hot drops of wat er penet rat e m y skin like t iny bullet s. The rhyt hm of wat er dancing on t he floor creat es a blanket of soot hing sound t hat envelops m e, m uffling t he chaot ic noises of our t hin- walled house.

I breat he in a m ist of herbal scent ed sham poo and liquid Dove soap, a welcom e change from t he sem i- arid air of Colorado. I n t he shower I am alone. No younger siblings barging unannounced int o m y room , no friends int errupt ing m e wit h t he shrill ring of t he t elephone, no parent s nagging m e about finishing college essays.

The ceram ic t iles t hat line m y bat hroom wall have t he perfect coefficient of absorpt ion for repeat ed reflect ions of sound waves t o creat e t he wonderful reverberat ion t hat m akes m y shower an acoust ic dream.

The t wo by four st all is t ransform ed int o Carnegie Hall as Neha Mahaj an, world- renowned m usician, sings her heart out int o a sham poo bot t le m icrophone. I lose m yself in t he haunt ing m elism a of an aalaap, t he free singing of im proved m elodies in classical I ndian m usic. I perfect arrangem ent s for a capella singing, pract ice choreography for Excalibur, and im provise songs t hat I will lat er st rum on m y guit ar. Som et im es I sit in t he shower and cry, m y salt y t ears m ingling wit h t he clear drops upon m y face unt il I can no longer t ell t hem apart.

I have cried wit h t he despair of m y friend and m ent or in t he Rape Crisis Team when she lost her sist er in a vicious case of dom est ic abuse, cried wit h t he realizat ion of t he urgency of m y work. I have cried wit h t he sheer frust rat ion of m y inabilit y t o convince a friend t hat m y religious beliefs and viewpoint s are as valid as hers. Wit hin t hese glass walls I can cry, and m y t ears are washed away by t he st inging hot wat er of t he shower.

The wat er t hat falls from m y gleam ing brass showerhead is no ordinary t ap wat er. I t is infused wit h a m yst erious power able t o act ivat e m y neurons. My English t eachers would be am azed if t hey ever discovered how m any of m y com posit ions originat ed in t he bat hroom. This daily rit ual is a chance for m e t o let m y m ind go free, t o cat ch and reflect over any t hought s t hat drift t hrough m y head before t hey vanish like t he ephem eral flashes of fireflies.

I st and wit h m y eyes closed, wat er running t hrough m y dripping hair, and t ry t o derive t he full m eaning conveyed in chapt er six of m y favorit e book, Zen and t he Art of Mot orcycle Maint enance. Now if only t hey had let m e t ake t hat AP Calculus t est in t he shower… The sparkles of falling wat er m esm erize m e int o reflect ion. Thought s t um bling in som ersault s soft en int o a dewy m ellowness.

Do t hese drops of wat er carry a seed of consciousness wit hin t hem? As I wat ch t he wat er winking wit h t he reflect ed light of t he bat hroom , it appears t o glow in t he fulfillm ent of it s karm a. Then, for a split second, all t hought s cease t o exist and t im e st ands st ill in a m om ent of perfect silence and calm like t he m irror surface of a placid lake. I know I have a t endency t o deplet e t he house supply of hot wat er, m uch t o t he annoyance of t he rest of m y fam ily. I t is a sm all pocket of t im e away form t he frant ic deadline and count less places t o be and t hings t o do.

I t is a chance t o reflect , and enj oy—a bit of welcom e frict ion t o slow down a hect ic day.

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The wat er flows int o a swirling spiral down t he drain beneat h m y feet. I t cleanses not only m y body, but m y m ind and soul, leaving t he bare essence t hat is m e. Mahaj an could have focused on t he academ ic subj ect s or ext racurriculars she m ent ions in her essay, such as physics or t he Rape Crisis Team , but inst ead she chooses a daily rit ual com m on t o us all. Though everyone can relat e t o t aking a shower, doubt less few shower in quit e t he sam e way Mahaj an does or find it t o be such an int ellect ually and em ot ionally st irring experience.

A relat ively m inor point is t hat her econom y of language could be im proved, as ot herwise fluid sent ences are occasionally overdone wit h an excess of adj ect ives and adverbs. Nonet heless, Mahaj an conveys her t alent for creat ive writ ing, and t his carries her essay for beyong t he lesser issues m ent ioned earlier. And, of course, her dist inct ive showers t hem e helps t his exhibit ion of t alent st and out. Adam , a pret t y boy wit h cropped hair, st ands beside m e, relat ing t ales of snowboarding in Sweden while slicing provolone cheese.

I relax in t he rhyt hm ic t rance of t he downward m ot ion of t he knife, as I wat ch t he red peppers fall int o precise slices. The door opens. A cust om er. Adam looks t oward m e. A m an st ands, looking at m e. His eyes, hidden under t angled gray hair, cat ch m ine, and m y eyes drop, down t o his arm s. Spider lines of old t at t oos st and out , words and pict ures and Plagiarism is severely punished! I know I am st aring. I look up. He looks at m e warily. He ext ends his hand, t hen — suddenly — pulls back. His face changes, and he leans t oward m e, cast ing a fright ened glance at t he cash regist er.

I t s com m on gray ext erior rest s on t he count er, t he green num erals displaying t he am ount owed. I t hink of m y first days at t he Five St ar, when I was sure t hat it was alive — a nefarious m achine m anipulat ing t he cost s t o cause m y hum iliat ion.

As t he days proceeded, we slowly gained a t rust for one anot her, and it s once evil dem eanor had changed — t o t hat of an ordinary m achine. I t hink of t he world — cont rolled by m achines, t he cars and com put ers and clocks — would t hey, could t hey, rise up against us? The espresso m achine is behind m e, it could at t ack — t he hot wat er spurt ing fort h, blinding m e as t he cash regist er falls and knocks m e ont o t he floor as I — No, of course not. Sensibilit y wins again.

He eyes m e, unt rust ing of m y words, in need of reassurance. He t akes his coffee wit h bot h hands, and sips it. The cash regist er sit s, silent on t he count er. I m agine reading st acks of essays about m undane t opics, and t hen com ing upon one about red peppers, provolone cheese and a cash regist er — how could it not st and out?

Rat her t han describing a life- alt ering experience or an influent ial relat ionship, t he writ er reveals herself and her t alent s indirect ly by bringing us int o a capt ivat ing scene. Even if all t he essay does is grab our at t ent ion and force us t o rem em ber it s aut hor, t his essay is a success. The dialogue wit h t he em aciat ed m an raises provocat ive quest ions about m odern life. How do we relat e t o t he m achines around us? And how do m achines affect our relat ions wit h people of different classes and backgrounds?

The essay does not pret end t o answer t hese quest ions, but in raising t hem it reveals it s aut hor t o possess an im pressive degree of sophist icat ion and, at bot t om , an int erest ing m ind. For one, t he scene seem s so surreal t hat we are led t o wonder whet her t his is a work of fict ion. Moreover, alt hough t he aut hor proves t hat she is t hought ful and t alent ed and has a vivid im aginat ion, m any quest ions are left unanswered. Does t he aut hor want t o be a writ er? How would her creat ivit y t ranslat e int o a cont ribut ion t o t he com m unit y?

We would need t o rely on t he rest of her applicat ion t o fill in t hose gaps. A M e m or a ble D a y A Mem orable Day - - by Ayana Elizabet h Johnson Walking t hrough m eadow and forest and m ud, helping and being helped across st ream s, looking at lakes, st ars and t rees, sm elling pines and horses, and generally t raveling t hrough a half- seen world, all happened before four A. The t en of us st opped near a wat erfall t o absorb t he beaut y of t he rising sun.

The sky was on fire before t he em bers died out and only t he blues and yellows rem ained. I saw t he beam s of t he sun slide down from t he sky and int o a m eadow, and felt m y happiness slide down m y cheeks. To t he sky I sang m y t hanks. As our j ourney t o t he Grand Pyram id cont inued, I m et new flowers.

At t he base of it s peak, I looked up wit h excit em ent , and t hen out for st abilit y. I nt im idat ed and yet det erm ined, I st art ed t o crawl up t he m ount ain. At t he t op, t he four of us who had cont inued from t he base were greet ed by t he beaut y of needle peaks and m ount ain ranges and m iles of a clear view in every direct ion, wit hout t he bit t erly cold winds and t he fear of height s I had expect ed would be t here t oo.

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There was sim ply nat ure and sunshine and friendship, and t he elat ion t hey bring. Balloons were blown up and at t ached t o m e. On t he way down, inst ead of t ears of j oy t hat had accom panied t he sunrise, t here were songs of j oy, and I t hought. I realized t hat t he rewards and t hrills and m em ories are in t he j ourney and not in reaching t he dest inat ion. I had believed t his before and even said it out loud, but t his was different. I looked at everyt hing along t he way. I st opped and rest ed and at t em pt ed t o et ch each different view int o m y m em ory.

I had only been singing for m yself and for t he m ount ains, but everyone had heard m e, and, when I reached t he bot t om , I was greet ed wit h congrat ulat ions and laught er — aft er all, I did have balloons t ied t o m e. And t he j ourney cont inued. The wat erfall we had only really heard before day- break was now visible, and I was convinced t o j um p in and m ake it t angible t oo. I plunged m y head under it s t orrent ial flow, only t o receive a headache from it s coldness as a reward for m y boldness.

I rem oved m y- t hen- num bered- self from t he wat er and was lacing up m y boot s when it began t o hail. I had been wishing t hat snow would fall on t his August day, but hail was close enough. The few of us who had braved t he wat erfall t hen ran t o cat ch t he group in t he forest before t he im m inent t hunderst orm arrived. The st ream s we had helped each ot her cross in t he dark were no m ore t han rivulet s t hrough a field in t he light. The m yst erious woods were t urned serene by t he rays of t he sun, and I t hought of t he great chasm t hat oft en exist s bet ween appearance and realit y.

The m ud puddles t hat had been obst acles were now only anot her det ail of t he landscape, and I t hought about t hings t hat are a challenge t o m e which ot hers find sim ple. The m eadow where I had t ripped while t rying t o st ar- gaze and walk, becam e a place t o cloud — gaze and wonder at t he st orm , and I t hought of t he m any ways different people can appreciat e t he sam e t hing.

The hum bling t hunder approached. I t growled. Suddenly, t he fright eningly beaut iful com panion of t he t hunder st ruck a hill not so far ahead of us. A friend, t he only ot her person who had seen it , and I ran scream ing and laughing int o t he t rees, but knew we would be all right because we were t oget her. A t rek by m oonlight , a sky on fire, leaking eyes, 13,feet up, balloons, geodes, songs, icy wat erfalls, hail and light ning were m y sevent eent h birt hday.

The aut hor uses a lot of act ive descript ion, which t he reader can easily relat e t o and alm ost experience a part of her j ourney. The com parison bet ween daylight and m oonlight also works well because it allows t he writ er a Plagiarism is severely punished! The reader m ay be slight ly disorient ed by t he lack of cont ext for t he st ory, as we are not t old where t he aut hor is or why she is clim bing a m ount ain. However, t hrough t he carefully cont rolled descript ion t he aut hor reveals her reflect ive nat ure and personal realizat ion as she ascends and descends t he m ount ain, hence, showing t he parallel physical and em ot ional progression.

Her concluding sent ence, t hough not part icularly poignant , serves as a st rong sum m ary of a well- writ t en piece. A night Unforgot t en By Frederick Ant wi An hour before t he com m encem ent of t he personalit y cont est , I deposit ed m y bag carefully in a corner of t he changing room.

From m y vant age point , I could see t he m uscular seniors com paring t heir lovely t hree- piece suit s and m using about which one of t hem would win t he t it le. A bony, st ut t ering j unior wit h no suit and no new shoes, I swallowed hard and resolved t o give t he pageant m y best shot. Wishing hopelessly t hat m y m ot her was am ong t he spect at ors and not working in som e hospit al in a foreign count ry, I st epped out ont o t he polished wooden st age. I m m ediat ely, one t housand t wo hundred curious eyes bore int o m e.

My cheeks t wit ched violent ly, m y t hroat const rict ed and m y knees t urned t o j elly. I fought for cont rol. Bending m y arm s slight ly at t he elbows, I st rut t ed across t he st age in t he usual fashion of an Asant e m onarch and m ercifully m ade it back t o t he changing room wit hout m ishap. The crowd erupt ed int o a frenzied cheer. I t was singular em ot ion t hat no words can describe. I t began as an aching, beaut ifully t enderness in t he pit of m y st om ach, gradually bubbling int o m y chest , filling m e wit h warm t h and radiance, m elt ing away all t he t ension.

Slowly, it effervesced int o m y m out h, ont o m y t ongue and int o words. As I spoke t o t he crowd of m y past im es and passions, words of such silky t ext ure poured out from m y soul wit h unparalleled candor and cadence. The voice t hat issued from m y lips was at once richer, deeper, st ronger t han I had ever produced. I t was as t hough an inner self, a core essence, had broken free and t aken cont rol. Severed from realit y, I float ed t hrough t he rem ainder of t hat rem arkable evening. One hour lat er, t he barit one of t he present er rang out int o t he cool night air.

GI S Personalit y , select ed on t he basis of confidence, charism a, cult ural reflect ion, Plagiarism is severely punished! My heart pounded furiously. My breat hing reduced t o shallow gasps. For a few sacred m om ent s, t im e st opped. My ears scream ed, and m y lower j aw, defying t he grip of m y facial m uscles, dropped like a draw- bridge. Then I rushed forward, bear- hugged t he present er and em braced everyone else I could lay m y hands on!

Am idst t he t um ult , t he Manager of KLM Airlines m ount ed t he st age, present ing m e wit h a m et er- long Accra-Am st erdam - London ret urn t icket. As I st ood brandishing m y sky- blue cardboard t icket , posing sham elessly for t he cam eras and grinning sheepishly at t he t hrong, a pang of regret shot t hrough m e. I f only m y m ot her could have been in t hat crowd t o wit ness and indeed be a part of t his m ost poignant of all m em ories.

Reading the essays will make one realize, that most students have spoken of something very personal and not something general. Reading the analysis will make one know what someone else in this case a Harvard Crimson representative thinks about that essay. And that is important. But to be selected into a reputed college one has to be original and not do something that someone else has already done. So it is fair to take ideas and then work on them. That is the important part. That is the point one needs to keep in mind. Sep 07, Liz rated it it was ok Shelves: Considering that this was a required read during my senior year in high school why did I rank something like this so low?

PRIVILEGE Apart from three or four of these essays, which were quite unique and interesting to read I remember one about a shower, a monologue in a theater, and a young man who liked magic. These essays were written by students who are wealthy enough to travel extensively in high school. They were cliche, even if they were written well.

Students shouldn't read a book like thi Considering that this was a required read during my senior year in high school why did I rank something like this so low? Students shouldn't read a book like this to get a sense of how to write a college application essay. What they should do is this: It will bite them in the butt when that same essay gets that student into a top school. This is a chance to set themselves apart and if you don't have fun writing it, then the people on the other side won't have fun reading it. This is coming from a former student who got into all her schools, including top rated schools on her application essay.

Nov 12, Sara rated it really liked it. This informational book,"50 Successful Harvard Application Essays" pages written by the staff of the Harvard Crimson, is an excellent tool that helps guide seniors struggling with writing the dreaded college essay. Because the topics for these essays are often very vague, many students often have no idea where to begin.

This book pro This informational book,"50 Successful Harvard Application Essays" pages written by the staff of the Harvard Crimson, is an excellent tool that helps guide seniors struggling with writing the dreaded college essay. This book provides its readers a variety of examples to use for inspiration and ideas. Furthermore, each essay is followed by a brief analysis of weaknesses and strengths. As a senior, I found this book to be particularly helpful in providing insight on what works and what doesn't. It helped me learn how to pick a topic, structure my essay, keep my readers entertained, and avoid common mistakes that many students make.

I would recommend this book to anyone applying to college who needs some ideas to get started on their essays. Aug 07, Catalina rated it really liked it. If you need inspiration to write a creative and persuasive essay or even a cover letter this book is a great motivator. I particularly enjoyed the immediate gratification of the critique given after each entry.

It is fascinating to learn what components of the writings were viewed as positives in many cases. None of them are "wrong", it's simply a case of each of the aforementioned demanding a different focus for their purposes. However, it's confusing for kids to know how to switch gears and give them all what they want to hear and in what way. This book offers them a guideline to steer them onto the right path for college essays, which is a relief in the hurricane of all the conflicting information surrounding them.

I wish I had read this book before applying to US colleges. Very useful and provoke thinking. I pretend to be an admission office while reading it. That means I read many essays continuously in a day and then tried to remember them the next day, then choose 10 best out of The best thing I like about the book is not its essays but the comments from the Crimson staff which pointed out how good and how bad a PS could be. After reading this book, I want to write my personal statement again, and I wish I had read this book before applying to US colleges. After reading this book, I want to write my personal statement again, and I will soon.

Jan 26, Mohamed Naser rated it really liked it. The book was truly incredible it gives you a really beautiful insight of how it is in Harvard! I strongly recommend this book. This is a good reference. I am trying to perfect my application essays. I have one but I will be applying to more schools and I want a really strong essay! This is my 2nd ref. Read this one if you need help for college applications. This is a fun read. Sometimes my reaction is, "I had no idea that's all it took to get into Harvard", other times it is , "Wow, now how in the world did he think of THAT?

Feb 08, Maria Dudley rated it really liked it. Really helpful if you have a child who will be applying to college soon even if they aren't interested in Harvard or filling out other sorts of applications. The personal statement, however, is a blank slate that allows you to share and emphasize the qualities that make you stand out. It permits you to make a creative, distinctive, and even emotional appeal directly to the admissions officers. In a process dominated by test scores and statistics, the admissions essay provides a much-needed human touch.

But where do you even start to find ideas for the essay, let alone write? As fellow students who have been through the college application process, we understand the questions and concerns that essay-writers often face, and in this book, we seek to provide straightforward and realistic advice that will help steer you toward success. Only you are able to articulate how different people and different experiences have molded you into the person you are today. The Harvard Crimson has compiled some tried-and-true guidelines that will be helpful for writing almost any college admissions essay.

Here are ten tips for you to keep in mind as you embark on the writing process: Start thinking about the essay early. Nevertheless, as you barrel through your senior fall, keep an eye out for potential essay topics. Read through some essays that have worked in the past to get an idea of what an admissions essay ought to look like. Think back through your years and identify experiences, people, places, or lessons that have shaped your character and personality.

Finding an essay topic is arguably the most challenging part of the whole process, so give yourself plenty of time to think of something that you really care about. Think strategically. The admissions essay is your opportunity to set yourself apart, to elaborate on who you are beyond your grades, test scores, and extracurricular activities. Spend the necessary time to reflect on yourself and your experiences, and get to know your strengths and weaknesses.

This will help guide you in searching for a good essay topic. Talk about your hobbies, play up your unusual talents or areas of expertise, or describe something formative from your past. Not everyone has exotic experiences or prodigious talents to showcase, but certainly every applicant has a unique and interesting background to illuminate.

Creativity, thoughtful analysis, and skilled writing can make even the most routine happenings exciting. Answer the question. Simply drafting a universal response and filling in the blanks will not demonstrate to admissions officers that you have the ability to think critically and to understand nuance. As with any good essay, use evidence, supporting facts, and examples to prove your point.

Be careful with gimmicks. Some people have successfully written poems or drawn comics for their personal statements, but they are few and far between. Just remember that, especially with this personal statement, execution is everything. A piece that is inauthentic most likely will not be distinctive in the way that you had hoped. Know your thesis. What is the purpose of your essay? Why will an admissions officer want to read and remember your essay? What message do you want people to take away from your essay?

Knowing these answers ahead of time will also make your writing genuine, clear, and compelling. Be tactful, try to write insightfully and critically, and, most of all, make sure that your message is clear. Be yourself. The college admissions essay is a personal statement. Each person has his or her own writing style and tone, and essays should reflect that fluidity.

Be honest. Would you like to tell us about a lower price? If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support? Where to Begin? Examples that Inspire To help, this completely new edition of 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays showcases the exact approaches, both conventional and creative, that won over admissions officers at Harvard University, the nation's top-ranked college.

Strategies that Succeed 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays' tested approaches and straightforward advice make it the best resource for applicants who are looking for the insider's knowledge to get accepted to the school of their dreams. Read more Read less.

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